"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle" -Plato


Some might say I'm the best, but you can just call me Mary. =)

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(I’ve been meaning to blog, and I know they’re always really, really long, and no one has the time or the patience to read this, but I like having this as a reminder of my thoughts or feeling today.) FaceTimed this a-hole. I look pretty busted (studying hard can do that to you). Don’t get the wrong idea. I KNOW YOU WILL. Long story short, I owe him my life for teaching me who I really want to become, and he has shaped me for the better throughout the years. I know it’s cliché, but through our ups & downs, from meeting, talking, dating, falling out, hating each other, befriending one another, going right back to hating again, etc. He will ALWAYS have my heart (whether I like it or not). I’ve had my phases and my (somewhat) freedom. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m pretty heartless when it comes to relationships. It makes me dreadfully SICK to my stomach thinking of these stupid little girls being overly and drastically depressed, and over the STUPIDEST thing: BOYS. Posts, tweets, attitudes, all of which are centered around a boy who broke their fragile (& stupid) heart. WHO GIVES A MOTHER FUCK. Oh I’m sorry to offend you, your ex-boyfriend cheated on you? He was a player? You thought he was the one? My apologies to you… NOT! (& again) WHO GIVES A MOTHER FUCK. Even as a stupid tween, my mentality has ALWAYS been to outsmart, one-up, and to just have fun with the opposite sex. & I did not need any mother fucking (please excuse my language) picture quote on tumblr or a damn video to tell me otherwise. So if you’re the 99.9% of these stupid little girls who let these guys run your emotions, my bad for offending you. There ARE bigger and better things out there you can waste your time and energy on. ANYWAYS, I’ve been called a slut, hoe, whatever other name there is in the book. Yeah I care, yeah it hurts, but in my opinion, it’s not true. I’ve talked to more guys than I have shoes (& that’s alot, lol), I’ve cheated (if stupid middle school relationships count), and I’ve had my share of heartaches (even if I don’t show it). I wouldn’t say my insecurities have led me to be the way I am, I’ve just ALWAYS had my way, and whether it’s the outfit I wear or the guy I’m with, I’ve ALWAYS been indecisive. I JUST LIKE TO HAVE FUN, I’ve been told that I’m a flirt/tease or whatever, but to be honest with you, I (in the most innocent way possible) truly don’t realize it. Aside from a few weirdos, I usually get along with guys I’ve talked to from my past. Even though I do screw them over and stop talking to them, they still have some sort of tie with me, and in a weird, twisted kind of way, I like that. I think it’s because I don’t take these guys seriously, even though they want to get serious with me. I’m the type to avoid what I don’t want to come across, and I’ve mastered that these past 19 years. So when it’s time to get the boot, I do it in a nonchalant kind of way. Regardless of how attached I seemed, I can be “on-to-the-next-one” in a blink of an eye without having any remorse. Plus, I hate when guys get all clingy (biggest turn-off, in my opinion anyways).  I like to think I was a guy in a past life, or something (maybe lesbian? NAAAH, jk.) As much as my girly instincts want to kick in and bitch, some of these “past guys” have asked me for my perspective on their current pursuit or relationship. I usually answer, and go back to minding my own business. I don’t know how to classify myself. If I say I have a mentality of a guy then my intentions would be completely on opposite ends, but I cringe at the mere thought of “girl-world” (when it comes to guys, at least). So I’ll just categorize myself under “other”.  Well back to Sean. I could literally write a whole series of books to explain our relationship (maybe I should and make millions that way, NAAAAH, no one reads my blog anyways, lol). He’s not perfect, not even for me. He’s not the sweetest guy you’ll ever meet, he’s not the funniest, or the most playful. If you’ve ever been around us, we’re practically opposites. We fight more than cats and dogs, he bosses me around, and he knows how to get under my skin (which is pretty hard). He reminds me of Simon Cowell sometimes, always judging everything from the music I listen to, or the outfit I wear. But in a weird, twist of fate kind of way, he has my heart (and he doesn’t want to give it back), and always will. Call me stupid, judge me, correct me, whatever you do (even whatever I do) I CAN’T CHANGE IT, even if it meant to save the world. He is the ONLY guy that can make me cry, not because of his actions, but just because it’s him. It’s this unexplainable feeling, really. I guess he’s the reason why I’m heartless towards these other guys. I saw him for the first time in months the other day, he gave me a hug, held me for a bit, and uncontrollable tears spew from my tear ducts (it was disgusting). We’re back in our friend stage, I guess. NO, THIS DOES NOT MEAN I AM IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM, NOR DOES THIS MEAN I AM TALKING TO HIM OR WILL TALK TO HIM. I’m still openly available to anyone who dares try to compete with him (which isn’t hard, lol). I remember him saying during one (out of many) breakups that if I find the right guy, and he approves, he’ll let me go. Now, how hard can that be?  P.S. If you know him, PLEASE don’t say I posted this. -_____- He likes not knowing what I post, it’s better that way (trust me) kthnxbyeeee.

(I’ve been meaning to blog, and I know they’re always really, really long, and no one has the time or the patience to read this, but I like having this as a reminder of my thoughts or feeling today.)

FaceTimed this a-hole. I look pretty busted (studying hard can do that to you).

Don’t get the wrong idea. I KNOW YOU WILL.

Long story short, I owe him my life for teaching me who I really want to become, and he has shaped me for the better throughout the years. I know it’s cliché, but through our ups & downs, from meeting, talking, dating, falling out, hating each other, befriending one another, going right back to hating again, etc. He will ALWAYS have my heart (whether I like it or not).

I’ve had my phases and my (somewhat) freedom. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m pretty heartless when it comes to relationships. It makes me dreadfully SICK to my stomach thinking of these stupid little girls being overly and drastically depressed, and over the STUPIDEST thing: BOYS. Posts, tweets, attitudes, all of which are centered around a boy who broke their fragile (& stupid) heart. WHO GIVES A MOTHER FUCK. Oh I’m sorry to offend you, your ex-boyfriend cheated on you? He was a player? You thought he was the one? My apologies to you… NOT! (& again) WHO GIVES A MOTHER FUCK. Even as a stupid tween, my mentality has ALWAYS been to outsmart, one-up, and to just have fun with the opposite sex. & I did not need any mother fucking (please excuse my language) picture quote on tumblr or a damn video to tell me otherwise. So if you’re the 99.9% of these stupid little girls who let these guys run your emotions, my bad for offending you. There ARE bigger and better things out there you can waste your time and energy on.

ANYWAYS, I’ve been called a slut, hoe, whatever other name there is in the book. Yeah I care, yeah it hurts, but in my opinion, it’s not true. I’ve talked to more guys than I have shoes (& that’s alot, lol), I’ve cheated (if stupid middle school relationships count), and I’ve had my share of heartaches (even if I don’t show it). I wouldn’t say my insecurities have led me to be the way I am, I’ve just ALWAYS had my way, and whether it’s the outfit I wear or the guy I’m with, I’ve ALWAYS been indecisive. I JUST LIKE TO HAVE FUN, I’ve been told that I’m a flirt/tease or whatever, but to be honest with you, I (in the most innocent way possible) truly don’t realize it. Aside from a few weirdos, I usually get along with guys I’ve talked to from my past. Even though I do screw them over and stop talking to them, they still have some sort of tie with me, and in a weird, twisted kind of way, I like that. I think it’s because I don’t take these guys seriously, even though they want to get serious with me. I’m the type to avoid what I don’t want to come across, and I’ve mastered that these past 19 years. So when it’s time to get the boot, I do it in a nonchalant kind of way. Regardless of how attached I seemed, I can be “on-to-the-next-one” in a blink of an eye without having any remorse. Plus, I hate when guys get all clingy (biggest turn-off, in my opinion anyways). 

I like to think I was a guy in a past life, or something (maybe lesbian? NAAAH, jk.) As much as my girly instincts want to kick in and bitch, some of these “past guys” have asked me for my perspective on their current pursuit or relationship. I usually answer, and go back to minding my own business. I don’t know how to classify myself. If I say I have a mentality of a guy then my intentions would be completely on opposite ends, but I cringe at the mere thought of “girl-world” (when it comes to guys, at least). So I’ll just categorize myself under “other”. 

Well back to Sean. I could literally write a whole series of books to explain our relationship (maybe I should and make millions that way, NAAAAH, no one reads my blog anyways, lol). He’s not perfect, not even for me. He’s not the sweetest guy you’ll ever meet, he’s not the funniest, or the most playful. If you’ve ever been around us, we’re practically opposites. We fight more than cats and dogs, he bosses me around, and he knows how to get under my skin (which is pretty hard). He reminds me of Simon Cowell sometimes, always judging everything from the music I listen to, or the outfit I wear. But in a weird, twist of fate kind of way, he has my heart (and he doesn’t want to give it back), and always will. Call me stupid, judge me, correct me, whatever you do (even whatever I do) I CAN’T CHANGE IT, even if it meant to save the world. He is the ONLY guy that can make me cry, not because of his actions, but just because it’s him. It’s this unexplainable feeling, really. I guess he’s the reason why I’m heartless towards these other guys. I saw him for the first time in months the other day, he gave me a hug, held me for a bit, and uncontrollable tears spew from my tear ducts (it was disgusting). We’re back in our friend stage, I guess. NO, THIS DOES NOT MEAN I AM IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM, NOR DOES THIS MEAN I AM TALKING TO HIM OR WILL TALK TO HIM. I’m still openly available to anyone who dares try to compete with him (which isn’t hard, lol). I remember him saying during one (out of many) breakups that if I find the right guy, and he approves, he’ll let me go. Now, how hard can that be? 

P.S. If you know him, PLEASE don’t say I posted this. -_____- He likes not knowing what I post, it’s better that way (trust me) kthnxbyeeee.

POSTED 1 year ago
♥ 8 notes
♥ 8 notes
  1. mmmaryy posted this